The Extra in the Ordinary!

Ever lost something as a child that felt like a piece of your heart? 

As I rummaged through the memories of my childhood, one particular recollection stood out—the day my friend unveiled her color box. It was a treasure trove of creativity, complete with crayons, pencils, sketch pens, and pastel colors neatly arranged in a mini suitcase-like container. The allure of that box was irresistible; soon, the entire class clamored to acquire one of their own, myself included. Each item in that kit held a special significance, evoking a sense of wonder and emotional attachment.

Some of my classmates treated their color boxes with utmost reverence, using them sparingly to prolong their lifespan. Some, including myself, reserved its contents for special occasions, like drawing competitions, opting for other, more mundane supplies during regular art classes.

However, fate had other plans, and one day, my beloved color box vanished without a trace. Despite my frantic search efforts and tearful pleas, it was gone, lost to the abyss.

As time passed, I moved on, acquiring a new color kit and honing my artistic skills. The fear of using this one sparingly gradually dissipated, replaced by a sense of liberation and creativity. 

Yesterday, a serendipitous discovery in my basement reignited that dormant memory—the long-forgotten color box, dusty and weathered but still intact. I was flooded with nostalgia yet struck by its ordinariness!

Indeed, just as life becomes colorful when we embrace every part of the color box, so too does our journey become richer when we fully invest in our relationships, using each moment to craft memories and forge emotional bonds.

Ultimately, losing an emotional connection serves as a sobering reminder of its true essence. It’s not the physical object or a person or their outward appearance that makes them special, but it’s about what WE invest in them – even if they are not worth it.

Objects are just the stuff that would be in your basement when you don’t need them. And people, including us, are just humans.

We often obsess over unnecessary possessions while neglecting what truly matters. 

And we pour our hearts into those who don’t appreciate or reciprocate our efforts. We are that ‘extra’ in their ordinary.

Yes, keep the child in you alive, finding wonder in the ordinary.

But remember, it’s our love and energy that truly make life extraordinary.

Did you water your Orchid?

“You know, we are like orchids, while they are dandelions or cactuses, maybe with thorns – for selective people like us.”

We laughed when a very sweet friend of mine said this last week. However, it really struck a chord with me. He mentioned how even he felt the same way – the lack of care, empathy, and such excessive formality and brevity even in life-death situations – which feels unusual and selectively deliberate – especially when we pour our dedication, love, and care onto someone.

Have you ever heard of the concept of orchids and dandelions? The idea is that orchids, like sensitive flowers, thrive with nurturing and genuine care and bloom amazingly, beautifying your surroundings. Meanwhile, dandelions are seemingly unaffected by their environment. When provided with the right conditions, orchids can surpass dandelions in their achievements and well-being.

It got me thinking about how we navigate these dynamics, especially in the workplace. It is surprising how some folks seem to be so nonchalant about the struggles or triumphs of those around them.

Imagine pouring your heart out about a recent crisis only to get an “okay” in response. Or sharing the heartbreak of losing a beloved pet just to receive a casual “aww, sorry.” Or letting your guard down and sharing how someone made you feel bad and being told that they don’t care and you need to fight your own battle – even when the opponent is a parasite on them. Or when you share your concern under confidence about someone’s inappropriate behavior, which may harm them, and instead, you are blamed for sharing, while the other person gets rewarded for reasons best known to them. It stings, doesn’t it?

Such emotional insensitivity, especially with the ones who are always on their toes for you, often leaves them on the receiving end, feeling undervalued and emotionally drained.

I guess we all crave a bit of acknowledgment, a touch of genuine care, especially from those we spend most of our waking hours with. I also learned that I had been harsh with someone who was not able to complete his or her task. I realized that I need to have empathy and understand why they lagged behind – or what they feel.

It is not about expecting grand gestures or constant attention. Sometimes, once a day, a simple text or a quick check-in can make a HUGE difference – creating an environment where empathy and kindness are the norm, not the exception, and not for selective people.

Let us water each other’s orchids and nurture those sensitive souls who may not always speak up but deeply appreciate a listening ear and a caring heart.

Meanwhile, let me be lavender, bringing peace, solace, and support in life’s ups and downs and a constant source of comfort for those in need.

After all, in the hustle and bustle of work life, it’s the human connections that truly matter.

Did you water your Orchid today?

Endometriosis + Converse = ENDOVERSE

I used to pass out during my periods as a teenager. While people laughed and judged, offering unsolicited advice, little did they grasp the horror of my reality.

Image from my latest surgery in 2023.

Unbeknownst to them, and even to me, I was among the 1 in 10 females silently tormented by endometriosis, its grip intensifying as it reached the devastating stage 4. Adenomyosis, a frozen pelvis, and hemorrhages joined this silent horror, affecting my intestines, bladder, and kidneys. It was an overpowering force, consuming me, while the world remained oblivious to the monstrous hold it had on my life.

I carried on with life’s demands, working through the unrelenting pain. For nine years, I bled incessantly every single day – a steady stream unseen by those around me, as I dedicated myself to work, oblivious to the profound battle silently raging within.

Endometriosis: It is a silent intruder, where tissue akin to the uterine lining grows outside the uterus, causing debilitating pelvic pain and potential fertility struggles. This condition often stealthily begins with a person’s first period and can endure until menopause.

With no known prevention or cure, endometriosis wreaks havoc by triggering chronic inflammation, leading to scar tissue formation, adhesions, and fibrosis in the pelvic region and, occasionally, beyond.

The cause remains elusive, shrouding its unpredictability. However, amidst this shadow, there’s a ray of hope.

While endometriosis and adenomyosis are present in various forms—superficial, cystic, deep-seated, and even occasionally beyond the pelvic realm—the symptoms are where the battle becomes visible. Pain—agonizing and unrelenting—dominates the lower belly, peaking during periods, or basic bodily functions – as basic as walking, working, and surviving.

However, here is the stark reality: some experience this anguish without symptoms, while others endure an array of signs—chronic pelvic pain, abnormal bleeding, fertility challenges, among others—unbeknownst to them as indicators of this condition.

Yet, despite the spectrum of suffering, recognition and diagnosis remain elusive. Even educated individuals, including women, often overlook or misinterpret these signals.

In the span of the last four years, my journey has encompassed multiple major surgeries, numerous medical consultations and procedures, and enduring more than a thousand blood tests. Struggling to walk, stand, or engage in daily activities and enduring abundant medical gaslighting, I continued the hushed battle, pushing myself to work like crazy and live with an unrelenting determination, unaware of the silent strength within, which actually was bolstered by my Maa’s courage and encouragement to keep going, an indomitable force that has always fueled my journey.

This image, capturing my latest surgery a few months ago, isn’t shared to dwell on the hardships but to highlight the strength and perseverance woven into this healing journey.

There is no “cure”, but in awareness in understanding lies our strength. Together, let us shine a light, empowering women across generations to recognize, support, and advocate for those battling silently. In this resilience, there is hope—for a future where endometriosis is seen, understood, and supported.

Today, I extend my hand to collaborate, connect, and collectively generate awareness. Feeling the pain? Let’s connect.

Let’s break the silence. Let’s talk endometriosis. Let’s converse.
Here’s my initiative. Let’s ENDOVERSE.

Stay tuned.