The Beauty of Uncompeting

The ability to make every story about yourself is… remarkable.
Even more remarkable is when the same people call it empathy or emotional intelligence.

You say you caught a cold. They tell you they were hospitalised.
You mention you had a long day. They explain why theirs was longer.
You say you’re tired. They haven’t slept in days.

Somewhere, quietly, every dialogue becomes a competition.

There’s a concept called grandstanding. It’s when we turn every interaction into a stage. Not necessarily out of arrogance, but out of habit. A need to stay visible and be central in the frame.

Image captured by me!

Standing in front of this little shop window during a solo trip, I realised how peaceful it felt when nothing was competing.

No flowers trying to outshine each other. Bicycle is not asking for applause.
No urgency to prove anything because everything was pretty amazing in its own place.

Every story doesn’t need escalation, and every moment doesn’t need comparison, especially when people look up to you for advice.

Maybe it’s enough to listen without comparing.
To acknowledge without upgrading.
To let someone else have the moment.
We don’t always have to bring the spotlight back to ourselves.

It’s okay to let someone else’s sentence finish without adding our own headline.

And sometimes, a solo walk and a beautiful shop window are enough to remind you of that.

Monday Blues?

Monday blues are real.
But for some, they don’t end on Monday.

A colleague seems off.
A friend sends a “hey, you up?” text at 11 PM.
A teammate vents on a call.

Your instinct might be to fix it.
Or brush it off.
Or say you’re too busy.
Or that it’s not your problem.
Or that they should handle it alone.
Or that they shouldn’t have come to you at all.

And while you’re shutting them down,
They just want you to listen.
They don’t need fixing.
They don’t need solutions.

They just need you.
Listening. Present. Human.
Because they trust you.

And when you shut them down,
You don’t just end the conversation.
You break something they were brave enough to bring to you.

Here’s a fun fact:
Elephants stand silently next to a grieving herd member.
Not to cheer them up.
Not to explain the pain.
Just to be there.

PS: Yet another sketch by me. Because some messages are better felt than said.

It’s called “empathetic behavior.”
The thing we always talk about.
The thing we keep posting about.
The thing that sounds like a fancy mental health term.
But it’s really just being human.

And elephants do it better than most of us.

So if someone comes to you and vents today—listen.

You might be all they have in that moment.
And that might be enough.

Yes. Try to be an elephant today.
Ears out. Mouth mostly shut.

Did you water your Orchid?

“You know, we are like orchids, while they are dandelions or cactuses, maybe with thorns – for selective people like us.”

We laughed when a very sweet friend of mine said this last week. However, it really struck a chord with me. He mentioned how even he felt the same way – the lack of care, empathy, and such excessive formality and brevity even in life-death situations – which feels unusual and selectively deliberate – especially when we pour our dedication, love, and care onto someone.

Have you ever heard of the concept of orchids and dandelions? The idea is that orchids, like sensitive flowers, thrive with nurturing and genuine care and bloom amazingly, beautifying your surroundings. Meanwhile, dandelions are seemingly unaffected by their environment. When provided with the right conditions, orchids can surpass dandelions in their achievements and well-being.

It got me thinking about how we navigate these dynamics, especially in the workplace. It is surprising how some folks seem to be so nonchalant about the struggles or triumphs of those around them.

Imagine pouring your heart out about a recent crisis only to get an “okay” in response. Or sharing the heartbreak of losing a beloved pet just to receive a casual “aww, sorry.” Or letting your guard down and sharing how someone made you feel bad and being told that they don’t care and you need to fight your own battle – even when the opponent is a parasite on them. Or when you share your concern under confidence about someone’s inappropriate behavior, which may harm them, and instead, you are blamed for sharing, while the other person gets rewarded for reasons best known to them. It stings, doesn’t it?

Such emotional insensitivity, especially with the ones who are always on their toes for you, often leaves them on the receiving end, feeling undervalued and emotionally drained.

I guess we all crave a bit of acknowledgment, a touch of genuine care, especially from those we spend most of our waking hours with. I also learned that I had been harsh with someone who was not able to complete his or her task. I realized that I need to have empathy and understand why they lagged behind – or what they feel.

It is not about expecting grand gestures or constant attention. Sometimes, once a day, a simple text or a quick check-in can make a HUGE difference – creating an environment where empathy and kindness are the norm, not the exception, and not for selective people.

Let us water each other’s orchids and nurture those sensitive souls who may not always speak up but deeply appreciate a listening ear and a caring heart.

Meanwhile, let me be lavender, bringing peace, solace, and support in life’s ups and downs and a constant source of comfort for those in need.

After all, in the hustle and bustle of work life, it’s the human connections that truly matter.

Did you water your Orchid today?