Professional Heartbreak?

Ever experienced professional heartbreak? I know someone who had a severe one last week, and the surprising thing is that they were aware it would happen – but they decided to jump in – and finally barge out of it.

They said that they are experiencing disappointment, loss, and feelings of disillusionment.

Basically, we live in a society that doesn’t believe in understanding or even accepting others’ emotions or thoughts in a professional setup, and sadly – even at a personal level! 

Be a human. Don’t be an emotionally-challenged ‘Bing’.

We don’t even ask people if everything is okay in day-to-day life, even when we are working with them every single day – even if one day they look stressed.

We don’t know what to say when someone loses their loved one or is undergoing something severe on a personal front. 

We expect consistency in their behavior even if they have experienced betrayal, denial, or dismissal – that too, from us!

We have no idea how to process uncomfortable conversations – we never trained ourselves for that! And we call this ‘professionalism’.

And then we wonder why people are making tiny mistakes. Why is someone not paying attention to details the way they previously did? Or why is someone not behaving or treating us the same way they used to?

I told them that, basically, someone’s consistent unwillingness to hear us out when we are hurt is not an indication that our hurt is invalid. It’s their deliberate and thoughtful choice.

While now you may have trained your heart and mind to accept disappointments from the people you trust more than yourselves, remember that patterns are louder than the occasional breadcrumbs.

We need to understand that sometimes, people don’t want to ‘win’ the argument or prove themselves ‘right’. That’s never the objective. They just want to feel like the person they are talking to has come to an understanding of the issue at hand and appreciates the conversation – and will ensure that things are better in the future. It’s a phase where both of them can talk and feel heard and understood. It’s not a competition – it never is.

If you want to make a difference in someone’s life, you don’t need to be powerful, rich, famous, intelligent, or perfect. You just need to care – especially for the ones who care for you.

Sit. Converse. Resolve. And speak out.